Tuesday, September 14, 2010

True Blah

Spoilers abound, you fools.

I absolutely adore True Blood.  It's everything vampires should be, and in the times where vampires are everywhere and truly inescapable, the life-challenged inhabitants of Bon Temps are the best representation of the monsters that vampires SHOULD be.  (Don't even get me started on Twilight) True Blood is dark, gritty, bloody, sexy, and consciously campy - I can't say that the acting is particularly strong from some players, and some moments or lines or facial expressions or Anna Paquins are quite cringe-worthy at times, but the show knows that it's a ridiculous romp of a good time and it doesn't take itself too seriously.  We are, of course, referring to the show whose second season antagonist was a Greek devil goddess whose evil on the residence of Bon Temps came in the form of blacked-out eyes and orgies.

Now, the third season (which just wrapped on Sunday) was a bit scattered when compared to the first two seasons, though still solid.  In my opinion, the first season was the greatest, second season was still good but faltered because of misguided focuses.  (I could not wait until Maryann was killed.  Too bad it took to the finale) In the third season, none of the characters were connected - the most we got at the same place was mid season - as they all lived their own storylines.  That, I think, was the third season's biggest flaw, as pace was an issue since we spent so much time jumping from story to story after three minute scenes.  In some episodes we saw Sookie for maybe five minutes tops, and I know I don't exactly like her, but she's the friggin MAIN CHARACTER Jessica has been reduced to a single scene an episode, which is disgusting.  Useless characters (Jason, Crystal, Lafayette's boyfriend Jesus, dare I even say Arlene) were given way too much focus when good characters (Jessica, Alcide, Pam) were forgotten about for big portions of time.  Not to mention they messed Sam up.

Pace aside, I loved the season.  We were introduced to great new characters (Debbie, Alcide), and I can honestly say that I was constantly in awe of some of the plot twists despite owning and reading books 1-10.  A particular highlight was the fight between Sookie and Debbie, but that's another story.

Now to my point.  (I know right? Matt, shut up)

What were they thinking with the finale?

There was no CLIMAX for god's sake!  The main villain, Russell, was virtually defeated at the end of the PREVIOUS episode.  Storylines were just dropped as their "resolutions": the last time we saw Eric and Pam they were talking about cement in their hair.  That's it for them.  We randomly see Hoyt's mom buying a vampire effective shotgun.  Then that's it for her.  Lafayette's seeing crazy shit.  That's nice.  Tara lops of her hair and looks like a motherfucking retard and that's it for her.  NOTHING was tied up.  I feel almost cheated, in the sense that this season served no purpose than to only set up the next.

I suppose I'm insanely happy that they stuck with the books in the twist that Bill was sent to Sookie by the Queen of Louisiana, that he LET Sookie get attacked so that he could feed her his blood.  He's horrible, and Sookie then banishes all vampires out of her life.  That was good.  (So was Hoyt buying Jessica a house and proposing.  Melt my heart)  Bill vs Sophie Anne, that was embarrassing.  If you're going to rip off the Matrix, do it with dignity.

But the closing scene.  Let me say that the previous two seasons ended perfectly; a body found in a car, Lafayette's? and then Bill is kidnapped, but by who?  The last scene of the season was ridiculous.  So we found out this year that Sookie had fairy blood, that's cool, it follows the books.  But for some reason the creator decided to represent a "fairy world" as some dumbass pond where idiot looking fairies pranced around like rejects from a Shakespeare play, that's stupid.  They ruined the character of Claudine, who should've been a 6 foot tall goddess, but we got some stumpy Brit.  The third season concluded with all these retarded looking fairies coming out of the forest around Sookie, Claudine approaching her with an outstretched hand, then lights come out of their fucking hands, then they connect, and then they fucking teleport away.


I'm still a fan, I still love the show, and yeah, I always excuse episodes as missteps, but the fact that it was the finale was tough to digest.  The cliffhanger hasn't left me wanting more.  Maybe I will... by the time it comes back in nine months.


  1. That's what happens when you skim shit. You miss the spoiler alert.

  2. Idiot, I was talking about my reaction to the season finale. I watched it like.. 10 hours ago.

  3. Now I'm unamused at that language.