(what in God's graces, Firefox, "schmooking" is certainly not a word - where is the mean red line of error!?) I'm a regular culinary connoisseur. Most nights during the week I settle for the quick fix of Kraft Dinner or Sidekicks straight from the pot (ssh, don't tell) but every so often, I'm struck with some sort of desire to cook legitimate food, and I've since surprised myself that I haven't given myself salmonella or food poisoning. Quite the opposite: I'm not a bad cook at all, and while what I've actually prepared has been restricted to chicken and its variants (I'm a poor student. I'm not going to buy beef), I shock myself bite after bite with succulence. In fact, tonight I made myself breaded chicken, my particular favourite, and I decided to be adventurous and make homemade fries like my mom does on rare occasions back home (AND I didn't fail!). While everything on my plate was fried fried fried, it was damn good. That somehow leads to my next point..
Bed Potato; or Swirly Desk Chair Potato
(I do not own a couch; thus I am not a couch potato) I've feared the dreaded "Freshmen 15" even though 1. I'm not a freshman; I guess I'm a junior? and 2. if I don't think my body is actually capable of gaining fifteen more pounds. With that in mind, I made sure that during my first weeks I didn't eat like crap - and, say, it actually paid off, for with going to the gym every so often, I actually lost a bit of weight. Cue my grandmother. Since going home two weeks ago and returning with boxes of cookies sent from my grandmother (who, as history serves, always brings me and my sister pounds and pounds of chocolate bars every visit, so I guess in a sense I'm lucky I came away without chocolate) my eating patterns have gone to shits. I try my best to limit my food intake from fast food places on campus to a minimum, maybe once or twice a week, but I can't help the Lazy Monster smacking me in the face some nights forcing me to cave and get a slice of pizza out of minimal desire to make myself something in the kitchen. Somewhat related, I haven't gone to the gym in the past little while, and I hate myself for it. The thing is, when I go to the gym, it's all cardio, so I sweat like a beast (grimy details) and I have to shower when returning; I shower every morning because my bedhead hair is beastly, so logically I'd go to the gym after waking up and before showering, but morning after morning when my alarm goes off at 9am I call it a very bad name (my alarm clock has been called "you motherfucker" or "shut up, you dumbass bitch") and opt for another hour of sleep before class. Can you blame me? My schedule is horrid.
I am the least productive person on the planet. I've read more books for pleasure this semester than I have for assigned readings. I have two midterms on Friday - two! I swear, the English department professors convene and schedule their heavily weighted tests all on the same day while drinking from goblets and cackling at the misfortune of us poor migraine and hand cramp-ridden students.. - and I have yet to legitimately study for them. I have an essay due in two weeks on a book that I haven't yet taken down from my dusty shelf. I skip most of my dry readings so that I can rush to play the Sims 3 on my computer; it was a very bad idea bringing that with me away to school (by the way, my vampire Sim got divorced from his wife because he discovered she had a child with someone else - say wha?). Or, I..
..watch Parks and Recreation nonstop. I finished the entire series (up until what's airing) in a matter of four days. The show is downright hysterical, and when I'm not actually rewatching episodes (and for that matter, still laughing as hard as I did the first time around), I'm finding clips on Youtube and watching them on an infinite loop until the end of time, or, until I decide it's no longer a human hour to be awake and that I should probably just shut my eyes and go to sleep. It's so good. I recommend it with every recommending fibre of my being. I've decided that I really must stop buying DVDs - I've bought four movies plus the third season of Parks and Rec in the past month - or I should just avoid anything that can be watched on any sort of screen altogether. Now that regular scheduled television is back, I also find myself rushing my readings so that I can be snuggled into my bed as I am now ready to watch Glee (urgh) and New Girl (I've decided to include Zooey Deschanel to my list of prospective wives) on Tuesdays or Criminal Minds and Modern Family on Wednesdays and - deep breath - Big Bag Theory, Parks and Recreation, Grey's Anatomy (it's out of laboured obligation now..) and Jersey Shore on Thursdays. Am I missing anything? Probably..
Well, that's my life now. I either post here drunk, or I eat like junk while not doing my school work and watching "Leslie Knope's Accent" on Youtube over and over again. (go Youtube it)