It's nearing the end of July and the thought of summer vacation coming to a close sends a wave of sadness through my mind. Registration for school will require its final step on Friday (when the course limit ups from 5.0 credits to 6.0, and I need 6.0), emails have begun to flood in about applications and whatnot for the upcoming school year, and tuition and residence fees have already started to pile up and appear. I don't want the summer to end, but it's inevitable. To be perfectly honest, next to nothing makes me want to go back, aside from the idea that I'll be experiencing the residence life (that idea still terrifies me) or that I legitimately sometimes miss going to class (that longing for education is only fleeting because I bring myself down to reality and slap myself across the face - who wants school when you can do nothing all day?) or that sometimes I miss some friends. I guess I'm most looking forward to the change of pace in my routine, but even that will become stale after a while, I'm sure.
Enough about that - let's put off the unfortunate future for as long as possible. My summer hasn't actually been that stellar - it's simply rooted in me to dread the end of summer regardless of how good or bad it's been. That being said, though, it hasn't been dismal; in fact, it really has been anything but. My "un-stellar" claim comes from the fact that I haven't traveled or gone to Wonderland yet or what have you. But like I said, I look forward to the change of pace, but if anything, I'll miss the pace I have now, which mostly resembles waking up around 11am and doing nothing for a while until I look at the clock and decide it's no longer a respectable hour to still be in my pajamas and un-showered.
I remember at the beginning of May I wrote a blogpost about my aspirations for the summer months ahead of me then, and as corny as it sounds, when I reread it I can't help but already realize how different I am since writing it.
By my luck the gym I was a member of went bankrupt and closed down in the middle of June which absolutely sucked considering I was actually getting into a routine and changing my lazy ways. My friend (who I was going with) and I were adamant about finding a new gym but as the weeks went on the prices of the other gyms seemed far too steep for only two full months left of summer. If anything I'm happy I at least followed through, and now I have enough knowledge to carry with me so when I live on campus for the school year and go to the gym I won't look like a noob. I do genuinely miss doing but I don't have enough motivation (or fancy shmancy equipment at home) to carry it out by myself. The summer's supposed to be a time of vegging, anyways, isn't it?
I also wrote about how I had begun writing, and despite my standstill, I did in fact follow through with it. I realize I said I wanted to write a screenplay back in my May post, but the thought that you need a solid idea and story before writing a screenplay begged me to actually come up with a story in the first place, and I think I just went "screw it" and chose to write it as a story first and foremost. I have another story idea already swirling in my mind - in addition to the one I'm attempting to write as well as this basic concept with basic characters I've been resonating for at least a year or two - so we'll see if I ever rediscover that writing ignition like I had about a month ago. Today could be the day.
You'd think that my summer was full of procrastination and laziness, and you'd be right. I haven't picked a book up in literally months despite constantly buying new ones; I have a stack of about thirty books, which started accumulating two Christmases ago, waiting to be read, but when I feel the want to read I end up picking either 1. a book which I discover to be the first of a series of seventy so I'm obliged to buy them all and read them, or 2. Harry Potter. Instead I've spent a lot of my time watching TV online, which is basically just like books, but for dumb people. I watched four seasons of the UK show Skins a while back and still need to watch the fifth; I was roped into watching Grey's Anatomy but it's become my guilty guilty guilty pleasure and despite me not being its target audience (kinda like my Taylor Swift dilemma on my previous post) I literally can't stop. (How'd I get roped in, you say? Two of my friends are Grey's obsessed and for Halloween they've devised a plan where at their Halloween party, it's more than likely that if you're attending, you've been assigned a Grey's character to dress up as. I'm - wait for it - Patrick Dempsey. Natural fit. I'll be a part-time Dr. Derek Shepherd while being a part-time X-Men: First Class Magneto. It'll turn into a drunken me wearing scrubs and Magneto's helmet)
From everything I've said it would sound like I've been a social recluse this summer and that is far from the truth. It's sometimes difficult when your core group of friends all work constantly, and it's similarly difficult when days off don't always coincide. I see my friends as much as possible, and I'm grateful for it. In addition to that I feel like this summer I've made better friends with friends I've always had around me outside of my core group, and I'm grateful for that, too. I'd consider myself a "regular" now at a bar where a big group of us go on Thursday nights for karaoke, and while my singing voice hasn't improved (nor has my constant drunk pressing need to sing Lady Gaga), it's always a blast. I'll be camping on the first week of August, and fingers crossed that I don't flip a bike into a swamp and break my arm like I did within the first few hours of the last camping trip I've been on. I doubt it'll happen. I've traded my bike for at least two cases of beer.
All things considered I've been having a really good summer break, but it's tough to put aside what's in the near future because its become just that - the near future. The progression along the calendar seems to be in fast forward, and while I want to hang onto what I have now, I'm sure come the beginning of September I'll be looking forward to the new things ahead. I'm just as sure that if you come back here at the end of September there'll be a post complaining about school and classes and people and that I'll be begging to get back to summer.