Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Overdrive

Ah so, the ceremonial first post of 2011!  I wish it came with good tidings and news of happiness, but I report nothing but the opposite.

I've been back at school for two days and I'm already burnt out.  I sit here completely exhausted with absolutely no desire to do the readings that need to be done for tomorrow, and to be completely honest, I won't be doing them tonight - that's what tomorrow morning will be for.  I don't know why I'm so tired, or why I'm beyond stressed out, despite only just starting with no work due.  Am I not capable of handling six courses?  I'm sure I can, but perhaps the thought of having added work is mentally distressing me.

Maybe it's because there is so much added work.  Taking both Children's Literature and the Canadian Short Story - both of which meet three times a week, Monday Wednesday Friday - didn't seem like that great of a feat, given that they're, well, kids books and short stories, but now I look at the schedules and see at least one of each type for each course per class, I feel stressed.  No, the thought of reading a short story and something like Where the Wild Things Are by a given day isn't stressing; I think it's more keeping on top of everything, constantly referring to the syllabuses, and finding time where I can actually just sit down and do it.  On top of that, I figured a course on writing would be easy, and from a content and grading standpoint, I don't think it will be; however, the course itself is intense, since a heavy amount of work is needed to be done for each class (meeting once a week).

I think, though, it might have to do with my status as a commuter.  This semester, though, it's a bit different.  On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, I start at noon; on Tuesday and Thursday, at 1.  Despite my start time, I'm always on the 10:10 train, because that's the only time (and latest time) my mom can take me to the train station.  Then, as the train arrives, my bus leaves.  Even though I run, I watch the bus leave the station.. daily.  I then sit at the train station for another 40 minutes, since the buses run so (stupidly) infrequently.  What should be a relatively short travel time turns into something unnecessarily long and painful to endure.  Sure, you think to yourself, that regardless of the bus times, I'd still be there that early.  I'd say, I would much prefer being ridiculously early on campus and having something to do instead of sitting at the train station in a state of fury.  Point is, my days are extended by about two hours, and even if I have a short day of class and am able to be home early enough for dinner at 6, I'll still have been gone from the house for more than eight hours at a time.  Don't blame me for not having any motivation to do work?

Maybe things'll lighten up in the second week of class when I'm back into the groove.  But then, on the flip side, things should undoubtedly get a bit more hectic, as I already have deadlines for work due next week and that by then, classes should completely be into full swing after the introductory babble.  I wish I could just go to sleep until April, but for now, I'm holding out for the weekend.

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